Purpose Driven with Passion

Even when I'm at my best, it is not because of me, it’s him (God) that is within me. It is all for his glory, not mine. When I think about how big God is, that he can hold our galaxy in the palm of his hand, and I am but a minuscule dot compared to that and yet he loves me and longs to have a relationship with me. That is humbling. Michelangelo's painting of God reaching out to humanity tells it all. God gave us free will, yet he reaches with every muscle in his body to be with us and all we have to do is lift one little finger to close the gap. The words to my favorite song.... Aware by Salvador Even in the little things that never seem to big to me In the things I thought didn’t matter much at all As simple as my daily bread To the strength I need to get out of bed When I fly or when I am bout to fall Oh it's you in me that I fail to see Make me aware, make me see That everything I am is not all about me So Take my world and turn it around So that the obvious can finally

Just thought I'd share a little humor with everyone...... I had been wanting a leather tooling kit for some time, so that I could make leather wrist bands like the one I bought in Swaziland. My plan was to learn to do this and then show the ladies at El Shaddai how to make them. So Rob bought one for me for Mother's Day. I was so excited to get started and of course didn't prepare, I just wanted to make one. It was going great and I enjoyed pounding away on the lettering to imprint the leather, it was a great stress reliever, as my week had been very trying. Anyhow needless to say my kitchen table now has "El Shaddai" stamped into the wood! Bright side..... El Shaddai means God Provides, I guess I'll remember to say grace. And I actually hated that table until now! It may be a keeper!

It's been a few months since I updated my blog so here I am preparing to go back to Swaziland.. and this time I'll be taking with me a few of my dearest friends. I'm really looking forward to seeing Futhi. It'll also be great to see Busicewe, & Cali and Charmaine. It's still more than a year out, but our first meeting will be this Sunday, which makes it more of a reality. I signed Rob up to go, only he don't know it yet. I guess we'll see if he reads my blog. Maybe he'll find out when I tell him to park in long term parking at the airport. j/k

Day 1- January 15, 2008 Our team arrived at Bishop Airport at 11:30 am. Our families stayed for awhile visiting and then we said our goodbyes. Braden usually cries when we leave each other and it always breaks my heart, but this time was much harder as I have never been away from him for more than a few days. As Ashley walked away with a crying Braden in her arms, I started to cry too, which if you know me; you know that’s not uncommon. Some people look at crying as a weakness, but I believe it is a great strength. Crying always makes me feel better, not only is it cleansing but it also feels as good as screaming to the top of your lungs when you’re frustrated. After the goodbyes were said, we went on to our gate, but of course before we could get there; we had to go through security. It was pretty funny; the two young ones of our team Krista and Lisa went through like they knew the protocol and it was just part of their daily routine. Then along come me and Tammy, the two that “had th

Swaziland is an amazing place with wonderful, loving, kind hearted people that have a true love for the lord. I find it heartwarming to see people that physically have nothing, yet are so hospitable and willing to give you what little they do have. The one thing I notice here is that there is a whole generation that is missing, they don't exist, and many have died from aids. Children are living with their Grandparents or in home's where no adults exist. Many are sick and without proper nutrition or medical care. My heart breaks. The children at El Shaddai tugged at my heart and the orphanage is an amazing place with two very beautiful, kind hearted people that started it and continue to care for these children like their own. Amazing seems to be my new- often used word. My biggest fear right now is that there aren't any words big enough to describe my experience in Swaziland or the wonderful people there. I have truly fallen in love with this place and it has brought me clo

Swaziland Arrival- We arrived in Swaziland about 2:00 in the afternoon. Pastor Dale and Jennifer Willson(with Free Methodist World Missions) were there to pick us up. We went to the church that New Covenant built in Manzini and met Busisewe (her and her husband Vasco live next to the church which is on the same property). We also met several children that live in the village and attend the church. It is a custom in Swaziland to greet your guest by singing to them. This video is of Busisewe and the children of the village greeting us. Every time I see it, I want to be there. Each child then shared something about themselves. These children are very intelligent, and they have hopes and dreams for their future. I see a definite poverty here, not like you see in the United States though. Many of these children live in homes without electricity, some live in homes where their are only children living, some may have not eaten that day yet they have an innocent hope in their faces and they w

January 18-El Shaddai Today we went to the El Shaddai orphanage. It is located in the most beautiful mountain setting. The beauty of this place is a reminder of God's love and the glorious detailed earth he made for us. The bible says, "Long before he laid down earth's foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love. When we first arrived, we toured the orphanage and met the children, the ladies that take care of the children and Callie and Charmaine, the couple that have taken it upon themselves to love and care for all these children. What wonderful, loving people they are. The children here are bright and well behaved. We planted four gardens, along side to help, were several of the young boys that reside at the orphanage. They knew exactly what to do and took charge of the job at hand. It amazes me that boys of their age (grade 5) would be so eager to do such a chore. They were excited that they were invited to help. Pastor Dale, Krista and L

I spent some time with the Swazi ladies while they were making the jewelry that helps to support El Shaddai orphanage. I showed them a few beading techniques. They laughed though when I walked in with a hand full of rocks. I’m sure they thought I was crazy! I then showed them how to wire-wrap it and put it on a piece of leather.

Today is Saturday January 19, 2008, today we went to the hospital in Mbabane to visit the children. There were several mothers with their infants, many were very sick. We prayed with them and sang children’s bible songs to them. I spoke with a young mother with a very sick little boy, she said, he was 10 months old. He was so tiny; as small as a one month old baby. There was a small room at the end of the hall that abandoned children were kept. Some were abandoned because their parents had died, some because they were mentally challenged, one little girl about three years old was abandoned because their were too many girls in her family, her name had meant too many girls. There was a baby that was about 2 or 3, it was hard to tell his age as he was quite ill. He was in a crib and he was frightened of us. Cathy spent some time with him and he cam around a bit and she was able to touch his hand. It is so sad, he was so sick, so afraid and so alone. It is hard to write this as the memory

This is a picture of Lisa and Krista after riding with Pastor Dale!!!!! Today our team spent some time together and bonded with each other. Pastor Dale, Linda and Tom went to meet with Busiciwe to discuss church business. The rest of our team spent time in the devotions room talking. We had a lot of fun. When they returned, we headed to El Shaddai to work on the garden. On the way there we stopped to give candy to some Swazi children. I was hanging out the van window so that I could reach the children to hand it to them, I didn’t get completely in before Pastor started driving again, I think this has become a game to him as this was not the first time that I went flying in the van. I had to do some fancy maneuvering to get myself back in the van while it is moving full force and get back in my seat. It was quite comical and we laughed. I didn't know I had moves like that. You have to be pretty quick about getting in your seat and belted in when Pastor Dale is driving because the mi

We went to the dam near the orphanage; it was fun and we took many pictures. There was a family of goats walking along on the sidewalk. It was funny to see them just walking on the bridge. We had a lot of fun laughing, joking and cutting up. It was a good day. There is an electricity shortage in Swaziland, They turn it off quite often to conserve. The Dam has the ability to generate electricity for all of Swaziland and is fully functional, yet there is a disagreement over who controls the dam, so it remains off. Many are not affected by this, as they don’t have electricity, but what a waste to not use it.

Sunday, January 20, 2008 Today was the most amazing day yet. We started the day by spending a half an hour reflecting with the lord. I sat on the hill behind my room in awe at the beautiful mountain that God created. Such intricate detail, it’s so amazing how everything fits together in his grand scheme of it all. And as I sat there in peace, praising the beauty that he created, I came back to something I read once, “When God is at the center of your life, you worship, when he’s not, you worry.” What a wonderful way to start the day. I sure could get used to that. How many times do we allow life to get in the way and we don’t take time to spend quietly in his presence. Perhaps we should give ourselves permission to do this everyday. Perhaps we should schedule it on our planners. This country is beautiful! I really think Rob would love it here. The pace is so much slower. People aren’t in any hurry to get anywhere. And their outlook on daily tasks is “if it doesn’t get finished today, t

This is a photo of me and my sponsor daughter Ntambifuthi. She is 16 years old, somewhat shy, has a beautiful voice and a big love for the Lord! I believe God speaks to each one of us differently. For some it may be a voice, others may have visions and dreams, for some it may be an inner voice, for me it is a feeling in my heart. I had wanted to give something to Ntambifuthi to remind her of the time we shared together. I had a bracelet with me that I had made and thought that would be a good gift, as it was a bracelet that I wore often. We were on our way to Manzini and I would see her when we arrived. I put my jacket on and my bracelet broke. Right away I knew that God hadn't wanted me to give the bracelet to her. I didn't know why, I just felt he didn't. When we arrived and I spent some time with Ntambifuthi, she told me me she liked to read the bible and I could tell, she knew a lot of scripture. I commented that she must read her bible often, she said she didn't ha

As I sit here on the flight to Amsterdam with 3 hours to go, I can't help but think about what I leave behind. I am sad to leave such a beautiful country with such loving people. Sad to leave these people who physically have nothing, yet spiritually have everything. I try to mentally prepare myself for going back to the states. I feel changed by all of this as many have said I would. I want to hold onto that for as long as I can. I wonder what I will say when people ask about Africa. I want to shout how I feel, but there aren't any words in the English language that can compare. I pray that more will go and see, go and help, go and come back and tell others, for this is an experience that will be with me forever. I feel like I left my heart there. And in that I know I will do justice to this mission that God has set before me. This mission to tell others of the state these wonderful, loving, kind hearted people with such a joy for the lord are in. What an amazing experience to

Execution Mountain is just behind Tom's head in this picture. Tuesday, January 22, 2008 We went to the cultural center and to the game park. The cultural center was quite interesting. There is a mountain behind it called Execution Mountain. Anyone that broke the law used to have to go up to Execution Mountain and either jump off or run into a spear. I’m not sure what I would do if I had to choose, I think I would have to ask what was behind curtain number 3. I enjoyed the dancing and learning about the Swazi Culture. The grandmother is called the Go-Go, she lives in a hut by herself. If a child is in trouble with his parents and can get to the Go-Go’s hut before the parents get to him, he is safe and the parents can’t do anything. I like that! I mentioned this to Ashley and she said, what’s the difference? That is how it is with you and Braden. Traditional Swaziland dancing and singing at the Cultural Center At the Game Park we rode in a Land Rover that had a net around it as prot

Swaziland Team 2008-left to right, Tammy Urbina, Teresa Vaughn, Krista Back, Tom Mulanix, Pastor Dale Woods, Linda Mulanix and Lisa Morel Wow, my team and I will be leaving for Swaziland in a little more than a week. I am so excited, excited to be blessed with a mission through the Great love of God. God has a plan for each and every one of us, sometimes we forget to let him lead us though, or perhaps we ignore his gentle tapping on our shoulder. A friend of mine has a very funny tag-line on his email, it goes like this......God whispers in your soul and speaks to your mind. Sometimes when you don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at you. It's your choice: Listen to the whisper, or wait for the brick. I love that saying, for it is so true, and bricks hurt! Our team is being prepared for this mission by watching movies, documentaries and reading about the horrifying state many people in Africa are in and the hardships they face on a daily basis. It br